Here’s is an audio recording from co-facilitator, Barbara Avila, with a summary of tips from our C2U Before the Peak 21-day challenge.
Here we are. We are almost done with the 21 day challenge. We just have one more day. We hope this has been a helpful collection of tips for you to improve behaviors in your home and the homes of people you serve. Kristie will be sharing how you can access more information, if you like our approach and wish for more.
So today, I am summarizing what you have read in our posts over the past week. We shared about making sure children have a time and space for feeling good – a time for celebrating what Kristie calls someone’s super powers. When a child is in phase of challenging behaviors, we can wear down their confidence. Remember to provide opportunities to do the things they do well so they feel well-rounded while learning new and better behaviors.
When you are personally feeling like you are careening out of control on the red train. Make the adult choice to get off. Your child is young. The brain takes well over 25 years to develop its frontal lobe to full capacity. Your child needs your help to take a different train that is calm, quiet, and soothing. They may not join you right away but with consistency of offering it, they will.
Figure out ways to share control and create partnerships with your child. Children learn how to be independent through opportunities you present to them for everything from carrying a laundry basket to cleaning up after their play. But if you demand they do it alone, you are asking for compliance. If you share the control and partner, you can teach social skills, sharing, turn taking, interaction, and negotiation all in those little moments!
While you are sharing control and creating partnerships, balance those and behavior management with moments of celebration. Notice when your child is doing well and tell them so. Be authentic. If it is not true, stay silent instead of complaining. If it is true and they are doing something well, be sure to mention it and add a bit of touch with a hug, whenever possible. Everyone is different with touch, but everyone enjoys it. Find a way to make it safe, comfortable, and rewarding for your child instead of a way to GET them to do something.
BE SILLY! Let loose! Be silly! Everyone’s silly is unique and it makes life so wonderful. Just because your child has rough moments, don’t forget to bring out your silly. It will keep your child engaged and curious about you so that when you do have to guide sternly, they will respect, trust, and be curious about what you have to say.
And like so many things, these tips and methods are going to take practice. Persevere. Stay strong and diligent. By providing a safe and peaceful home that allows them to experiment and explore interactions with you with you staying calm and collected, you not only prevent behaviors but you provide your child with security for a lifetime.
P.S. Don’t forget to sign up to receive all 21 tips from our challenge.